Study Buddy (Day #75)

Posted in: PARALLEL, Writing

I had a rendezvous this morning.  With a woman.

And it was awesome.

(Note:  this post gets much less titillating from here.)

This morning’s rendezvous was an ultra-productive study date with my new study buddy, Rebecca.  Fellow novelist, fellow blogger, new friend.  Rebecca and I have discovered that we’re basically the same person, only she lives in NY, has no children, and is writing a book for adults not tweens.

Last week, Rebecca wrote about her Starbucks study date with her brother-in-law.  Reading about her productive Saturday morning, I was jealous.  I have no trouble getting up at the crack of dawn and writing on Saturday mornings, but it gets kind of lonely.  Sure, Lil Mil’s my perma-wingman, but sometimes I find myself longing for an adult-sized companion.  Someone with the language skills necessary to carry on a two-way conversation, should the inclination to conversate (not a word but should be a word) arise.

Yes, I have Husband.  But Husband is rarely with me on Saturday mornings, because on Saturday mornings Husband plays basketball.

Yes, I have friends.  But most of these friends have husbands who don’t play basketball on Saturday mornings and children with actual nap times.  These friends are not study buddy material.

So Lil Mil and I fly solo on Saturday mornings.  And most other mornings, too.

But not this morning.

This morning, at 10 a.m. (sharp!), Rebecca and I “met” at Starbucks.  That is to say, we both went to our respective Starbucks and logged on to Google talk.  We both arrived promptly at 10.  She had showered, I had not (that was probably TMI, but it felt relevant).  Lil Mil was sleeping soundly Chez Bjorn.  Everything was a go.  We chatted for a bit (as the best study buddies do), and then we got to work.  An hour and a half later, we checked back in with each other.  And guess what?  We had both been productive.  She confessed to some Facebooking and I admitted to a tweet or two, but for the most part, we’d done what we came there to do:  write.

Like I said:  awesome.

But the productivity wasn’t the best part.  The best part happened before and after the productivity.  When we asked each other about our respective novels (before).  When we talked about the stress (financial, emotional, mental) embedded in our writerly pursuits (after).  I felt … understood.  Noticed.  Known.


To this particular women I’ve never met but feel like I know.  To all the women who are struggling and juggling.

We are in this together.  We don’t have to do this alone.

+     +     +     +

(Do you have regular study buddy?  Do you find that you’re more productive when someone is watching you work?  Do you feel lonely in the midst of your creative endeavors?  Does having a baby by your side or on your hip make you feel more or less lonely?  Do you want to have a virtual study date with me???)

Did I mention it was awesome?


  •" alt="" />